Question

I was reading the Durarara!! light novel volume 1 and on page 184, Izaya says the following to Mikado:

“But while you may be dreaming of a life outside the bounds of normality, life in Tokyo will become normal after you’ve been here for a year. … If you truly want to escape the ordinary, you’ll simply need to keep evolving – whether what you seek is above or below.”

Mikado thinks that this is painful to hear because of how well he understood what Izaya meant. If he was unhappy with his life now, would he just keep searching for a new life forever?

Reading this was painful for me too. This made me think about the time I wrote about desire and how suffering relates to desire. Back to Izaya – what does he mean by evolving? I thought I knew, but I’m not sure anymore. Any thoughts?

P.S. I’m reading The Selfish Gene by Richard Dawkins. I read parts of it a few years ago for a Psychology class. I’m just reading it for fun now since I already have my BA in Psych. The book is about evolution, natural selection and altruism… so maybe that’s why I thinking about Izaya’s definition of evolving.

Tsundoku 積ん読

I was reading Kaiji Part 6, 賭博堕天録カイジ 24億脱出編 and these pages stood out to me.

Basically, Kurosaki owns a campervan that he hasn’t used. He tells Endo his dream of travelling all over Japan in his campervan. He has a pile of books he hasn’t read and plans to read them. Endo thinks that if Kurosaki hasn’t read a short 200-page book yet, then it won’t happen. Endo also thinks that this is all a fantasy; that Kurosaki will be bored of this kind of life in less than a month.

This made me think. I also have a pile of books I haven’t read yet. I keep buying books with the intention of reading them but I buy books faster than I can read them. There is a Japanese word for it and it’s “tsundoku.” Endo’s line, “Maybe you’re not even suited to reading books in the first place?” felt like it was calling me out on a personal level. I’ve probably read over 10,000 chapters of manga but when it comes to novels, maybe I’m too optimistic.

Sometimes I think about throwing my phone in a river and living in a cottage. I think about it again then realize that I would be bored in less than a day. I long for a simple life, but I think I secretly crave for something much more chaotic.

This is the kind of person I am.

Cute things make me happy

What’s up?

It was Boxing Day and I bought two long skirts from Uniqlo (and people made fun of them… They do not get my sense of fashion!!!). XD

I also bought Emoji stickers to decorate letters for my friends. I bought three cards the other day because I thought they were cute. I guess I am prepared. XD

Among other things, I bought these magnetic bookmarks (you can open and close them). As some of you guys know, I enjoy reading in my past time. This is my first time seeing magnetic bookmarks so I had to buy them. XD

I’m currently reading a book called Breaking Murphy’s Law.

Quotes!

I’ve thrown in quotes randomly in my blog, but these are some quotes I really like.

Certain kinds of knowledge rob people of their sleep.” – Haruki Murakami

“A man who has been through bitter experiences and traveled far enjoys even his sufferings after a time.” — Homer, The Odyssey

“Pain and suffering are always inevitable for a large intelligence and a deep heart. The really great men must, I think, have great sadness on earth.” ― Fyodor Dostoevsky, Crime and Punishment

“Books are often far more than just books.” – Roxane Gay, Bad Feminist 

“There is nothing alive more agonized than man” ― Homer, The Iliad

“Failure is a bruise, not a tattoo.” – Jon Sinclair

“Things are as they are. Looking out into the universe at night, we make no comparisons between right and wrong stars, nor between well and badly arranged constellations.” — Alan Watts

“The fastest way to kill something special, is to compare it to something else.” — Unknown

“Women’s sovereignty is central to Indian sovereignty because nations cannot be free if their Indian women are not free.” — Bonnie Clairmont, Hochunk anti rape activist

“If one is satisfied with things, one doesn’t complain about the downsides that exist, either.” – Georg Henrik von Wright, Finnish philosopher

“I need days when I can be alone, to think, to daydream.” — Margarita Karapanou, tr. by Karen Emmerich, from “Rien ne va Plus

“My heart is just like the ocean, has storm and calm and tides” — Heinrich Heine, tr. by Aaron Kramer, from “You Lovely Fisher-Maiden

“Laugh, cry, sing, become a flower” – flumpool, “Hana Ni Nare”

“Just because the nights are lonely, don’t force yourself to love somebody” – flumpool, “Yoru wa Nemureru kai?”

“Consider not whitewashing your film and receiving tons of love.” – John Cho

“I craved desperately some great savage joy, no matter how immense the suffering that might ensue.” — Osamu Dazai, No Longer Human

“Some days seem to fit together like a stained glass window. A hundred little pieces of different color and mood that, when combined, create a complete picture.” — Maggie Stiefvater, Shiver

“We suffer more often in imagination than in reality” – Seneca

“I was never really insane except on occasions where my heart was touched.” – Edgar Allan Poe

“All suffering originates from craving, from attachment, from desire.” — Edgar Allan Poe

“A library is a place where you can lose your innocence without losing your virginity.” – Germaine Greer

“Every 12 years Jupiter returns to the same position in the sky; every 370 days it disappears in the fire of the Sun in the evening of the west, 30 days later it reappears in the morning to the east …” — Gan De, a Chinese astronomer. He was born around 400 BCE.

“The greatest deception men suffer is from their own opinions…” — Leonardo da Vinci

“The fury of a demon instantly possessed me. I knew myself no longer. My original soul seemed, at once, to take its flight from my body; and a more than fiendish malevolence, gin-nurtured, thrilled every fibre of my frame.” — Edgar Allan Poe

“When you are content to be simply yourself and don’t compare or compete, everyone will respect you.” — Lao Tzu

“Knowing others is wisdom, knowing yourself is enlightenment.” — Lao Tzu

“Simplicity, patience, compassion. These are your three biggest treasures.” — Lao Tzu

“My head is full of things that I never tell anyone about” – Ling tosite sigure, Abnormalize

“I believe in you.” Words that water flowers – Michael Faudet

“Et tu, Brute!” — William Shakespeare, Julius Cæsar. Act iii. Sc. 1.

“People are losing their fear of hell,” asserts an evangelist. Well no wonder-it is said that familiarity breeds contempt.” – The Pantagraph, Bloomington, Illinois, October 9, 1948

“Even my own reflection turns its back on me.” – La reproduction interdite 1937, René Magritte

“They who dream by day are cognizant of many things which escape those who dream only by night.” — Edgar Allan Poe, The Tell-Tale Heart

“I am both happy and sad at the same time, and I’m still trying to figure out how that could be.” — Stephen Chbosky, The Perks of Being a Wallflower

“Oh… So you’re at a movie too.” – Tampopo. Dir. Juzo Itami. 1985.

“In this world, there are things you can only do alone, and things you can only do with somebody else. It’s important to combine the two in just the right amount.” — Haruki Murakami

“Autumn shows us how beautiful it is to let things go.” — Unknown

“Each of us has heaven and hell in him.” — Oscar Wilde, The Picture of Dorian Gray

“To love oneself is the beginning of a lifelong romance.” — Oscar Wilde

“I think it’s very healthy to spend time alone. You need to know how to be alone and not be defined by another person.” — Oscar Wilde

“If a poem hasn’t ripped apart your soul; you haven’t experienced poetry.” — Edgar Allan Poe

“Desiring to be loved, yet despise being owned” — Hebe Tien

“The moon was the most spectacularly beautiful desert you could ever imagine. Unspoilt. Untouched. It had a vibrancy about it and the contrast between it and the black sky was so vivid, it just made this impression of excitement and wonder.” – Charlie Duke

“In Japan, we practice something called forest bathing, or shinrin-yoku. Shinrin in Japanese means “forest,” and yoku means “bath.” So shinrin-yoku means bathing in the forest atmosphere, or taking in the forest through our senses.” — Qing Li, ‘Forest Bathing’ Is Great for Your Health. Here’s How to Do It, Time

“No matter how honestly you open up to someone, there are still things you cannot reveal.” — Haruki Murakami, Colorless Tsukuru Tazaki

Most of these are from books, but some are from movies and some are song lyrics and even tweets. All mediums are important.

If you like reading, I recommend “On Seeing the 100% Perfect Girl One Beautiful April Morning” by Haruki Murakami. It’s a short story and you can read it in five minutes.

I also love this poem:

“The colour of this flower
Has already faded away,
While in idle thoughts
My life goes by,
As I watch the long rains fall.”

– Ono no Komachi

You can read an earlier post on quotes here.

Listening to: Carrying You (Jazz ver.)