My Heart is Full

I celebrated my birthday four times this year with different people.

1st time

  • Taiwanese restaurant
  • My Hero Academia movie in theatres
  • bubble tea
  • my friend paid for everything – thank you
  • got Detective Conan cosplay, wig, wig cap, Oscar Wilde’s Happy Prince book, metal straws (including bubble tea straw), metal straw cleaner, card – in Kaneki bag

2nd time

  • Japanese restaurant
  • got Kumamon plush, hand cream that smells really good, postcard
  • getting Osamu Dazai’s No Longer Human book

3rd time

  • hot pot
  • got mustard cardigan, super soft hoodie, concealer, letter

birthday

  • first class was cancelled – I slept in and watched anime in bed
  • birthday wishes on social media, in person
  • free matcha lemonade drink from Blenz
  • gifts from parents and brother
  • getting free bubble tea from Pearl Fever
  • I ordered gifts for myself – cosplay stuff

4th time

  • Korean bbq buffet – thank you friends for treating me
  • friend picked me up and dropped me home
  • got Charmed Aroma candle with ring inside, homemade cupcakes, hand cream that smells really good, false lashes, lip balm, card
  • got necklace, strawberry matcha tea, glasses for cosplay, face masks, nose mask, lip mask, card

I also found out this morning that I won BiblioNyan’s giveaway!


I’m writing this post for myself, for my future sad days. When I feel sad, I can read this post and remind myself that I am lucky to have good people in my life. I tend to forget a lot of the things that people do for me.

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Alpacasso, Chopper and Pokeball plush & Tokyo Ghoul posters were gifts in the past

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I wonder if I deserve all of this. I’m struggling with this because I am no one special. I’m not used to this much kindness in my life. I’ve written before that I had a lonely childhood.

Thank you everyone. I hope that I am treating you with as much kindness. I don’t think I am, but I’ll improve on that. Maybe I am too harsh on myself, but these are my true feelings.

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Why I Like Anime So Much

I had doubts over writing this post, but all the support I received on Twitter made me complete it in the end.

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Screen shots from yesterday

In elementary school, I had zero interest in gossiping about other female classmates or gushing about boys. I hated Western pop music and reality TV shows. Most of all, I made zero effort to change myself or pretend to be like them. I do think that my indifferent facial expressions hindered me from making friends. No surprise, but I didn’t have many friends. I didn’t think I was better than other people because I didn’t like myself that much either. I felt that I didn’t belong, like an alien that belonged to another planet.

I went home after school right away by myself. During the summer breaks, I stayed at home by myself during the day because my parents were working. I watched anime all-day when I was home alone and did my homework when my parents were home. I had a lot of free time, so I achieved A’s in everything except gym. Anime was a way for me to pass the time and it distracted me so I didn’t have to think about real life. I read a lot of manga too.

I learned about the world, places, people, and relationships through anime. My life was uninteresting and uneventful so I relied on anime to be my guide. At the same time, I was able to differentiate between anime and reality. All too well. I felt indifferent towards reality. Anime worlds weren’t that great either because of all the challenges the characters had to face. Still, the impossible happened in anime. A notebook that could kill people? Anime was so interesting!

This is my favourite song, and it represents how I felt when I was younger. Strangely, the song calms me and I don’t feel sadness over loneliness anymore. I’ve learned to embrace it.

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My current life is so different from my lonely childhood. When I was young I didn’t have a blog, no outlet to express my thoughts and feelings. I just had anime. It was like a friend. I still watch anime because it passes the time. With countless titles to watch and shows coming out every season, it’s endless fun. It’s still interesting.

Now that I am more involved with activities in my life, I can spend my time blogging about anime, cosplaying as anime characters, drawing anime fan art, attending conventions and more. Being active with anime has made me part of this online community of anime bloggers. You are all so nice to me. Thank you for that. When I was young, anime was the friend that killed boredom. Now, anime has provided me with fun activities and many friendships. 

As a kid, real life didn’t make me feel a lot of emotions. I was neutral most of the time. Anime made me cry countless times, and One Piece was able to make me laugh many times. Watching anime made me feel human. 

I’ve been feeling so creative lately…

…due to my unusual high number of posts this month.

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It’s been raining everyday. 😦 My shoes get dirty. Sad!

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Thank you friends for not only delivering bubble tea to my classes, but also sitting in lectures too! I am grateful for my friend who watched my presentation. I did well on it, thanks~~

I want to give a little heads up. Expect more posts within the next days or weeks. Time to cosplay~~ Have you guys watched Bleach, Kagerou Project, or Lovely Complex? ^^

My Style 2

My fashion style ALWAYS changes. The main features of my current style are my round glasses (no choice lol), a choker, and rolled up jeans. I dress like this on some days.

I wear denim jeans on the days I have work. If I didn’t work, I don’t think I would wear pants. At first I was very unhappy about it (I love wearing knee high socks) because I felt like I couldn’t be myself. Well you know I would be happiest if I could spent the entire day at home by myself watching anime, reading manga, gaming, listening to music, drawing on my tablet, and sleeping.

:/

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I think that after March 17, good things stopped happening to me

On a brighter note, this hoodie is so soft and comfy. I want to wear it to school!!!

Once I was wearing bunny and panda stuff and this is what happened. Someone behind in me in class told the person next to them that there are many people trying really hard to get accepted into university, and then there are people like me who were accepted, but look so childish. What does that have anything to do with university admittance?

I suppose they didn’t do anything wrong because I am different, but I can be very mature when I need to be.

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Trying to hide my face ><

For starters, I am proud of my blog. I have very sweet followers!! Thank you!

I sincerely think that the cutest person in the world is my brother. I love him. I don’t know where I would be today without my friends.

My parents love me unconditionally and my mother has promised to order two new games for me next month. I can’t wait. The children at work are very nice to me. I’m learning so much about Psychology and I think studying is kind of fun… 🙂

Now that I think about it, why don’t I use what I have learned from Health Psychology and all my other Psych courses and apply it to my life? If I think about things from a more positive perspective, a lot of good things have happened to me. I get to see cherry blossoms and soon I will be able to eat strawberries. I got to pet sheep and take photos of them too!

I think my plan is to study really hard in school! Studying should be fun because I am the one who chose my major. I will be working hard, so I hope that everyone reading this will be fighting for their goals and dreams too!!

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Last year, around this time, I was really sad for a while. I stopped dressing up and didn’t take photos of myself. O: After the ‘thing’ that happened, I had low self-esteem and wasn’t motivated to blog.

This year, I don’t want to feel unhappy. I want to just wear the clothes I like, and I want to take photos of the things that make me happy.

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I don’t want to ever stay mad at anyone. I want to forgive, and then move on with my life.