More About Me

I’m writing this post because people have told me that they don’t know me very well. It’s kind of funny how I’m writing this on my blog considering the fact that a handful of my blog posts are about my day-to-day life.

First things first: My real name is, in fact, Rose. Hahaha.

If you frequent my blog or if you follow me on Instagram, then you know that I post very often. It’s because I cannot stand feeling bored. I have to be doing something. & I want to make it clear that this is different from the feeling that you have to be productive. I don’t think these are the same (for me, anyway). I think there’s a difference between being productive because of societal expectations (I do not care that much…) versus keeping oneself busy for the self.

I love to learn. I have a strong desire to constantly absorb new information and try out new things. Well, “new things” within the scope of what I want to do. I’m not very adventurous, you see. Learning how to play the kalimba, trying new recipes, piecing together a wooden house, and starting a new journal are the more recent things I’ve done as of late. I plan to how to cross-stitch. I’ve also looked into making bracelets amongst other things… Potential projects for the future(?)

The majority of the shows I watch are detective-type shows. The majority of the games I play are about solving murders and the same goes for the majority of the books I read. I spend a lot of time on my various hobbies: blogging, cosplaying, photography, and drawing.

I am continuously working on self-improvement. I strive to be the best version of myself and I value authenticity the most. I like making changes to my room and seeing how my fashion style evolves. It’s fun. Your home and outfits are like extensions of your personality. Do you agree? Maybe not for everyone, but it is for me.

While I am not a university student anymore, I am definitely interested in returning to school in the future for a third degree. Although, right now I am relieved that I am not attending school. It’s nice to be doing something else for a change. Basically, to replace the learning that I used to get from school, I have to find other means to acquire knowledge… literally any kind of knowledge is fine. So that’s why I always keep myself busy and why I post so much. 🙂

Tsundoku 積ん読

I was reading Kaiji Part 6, 賭博堕天録カイジ 24億脱出編 and these pages stood out to me.

Basically, Kurosaki owns a campervan that he hasn’t used. He tells Endo his dream of travelling all over Japan in his campervan. He has a pile of books he hasn’t read and plans to read them. Endo thinks that if Kurosaki hasn’t read a short 200-page book yet, then it won’t happen. Endo also thinks that this is all a fantasy; that Kurosaki will be bored of this kind of life in less than a month.

This made me think. I also have a pile of books I haven’t read yet. I keep buying books with the intention of reading them but I buy books faster than I can read them. There is a Japanese word for it and it’s “tsundoku.” Endo’s line, “Maybe you’re not even suited to reading books in the first place?” felt like it was calling me out on a personal level. I’ve probably read over 10,000 chapters of manga but when it comes to novels, maybe I’m too optimistic.

Sometimes I think about throwing my phone in a river and living in a cottage. I think about it again then realize that I would be bored in less than a day. I long for a simple life, but I think I secretly crave for something much more chaotic.

This is the kind of person I am.